Dustin as Satan? Edgar Allan Poe? A black wedding dress??

Yes.. a black wedding dress. Back in like 2001 or 2002 I watched a lady on tv marry herself (ok so this isn't going to help my argument) and she wore the most gorgeous, black wedding dress. Sooo... I said if I ever got married again, I would indeed wear black. My friends, co-workers and family alike have poo-poo'd the idea...

But.. let's look at this for a moment.

1. I obviously can NOT wear white
a. I'm not a virgin (pick your mouth up off the floor.. I know this comes as a shock, but you
look silly sitting there with your mouth gaping... Lol)

2. It, unfortunately, won't be my first wedding

3. I love the color black and think it is marvelously sexy


So.. in my quest to find someone who actually makes, markets, sells, offers, whatever a black wedding dress I've found.. well.. no one. So I periodically google search to see if I happen to find one. Yes, one day I do hope to be a Mrs. again. Marriage isn't bad. Sometimes it's the person we marry that doesn't work out....

I digress...

So I am just sitting here on the couch trying to find Dusty & Tim's housewarming registry (which I can't seem to find) and drooling all over the keyboard at all the stuff I want and think.. damn.. Larry & I didn't have a housewarming. Wait... can you have a housewarming if one of the ppl already live in the house? No? Yeah... didn't think that was "housewarming" etiquette. (askmarthastewart.com?).

So then I was thinking about Larry, and how sweet he is, and how he does little stuff for me. Not necessarily the stuff I might want him to do, but it's not all about that. It's taken me a long time (and I'm still working on it) to appreciate the things he thinks of instead of assuming he'll do what I would like. For instance, he bought a wireless internet grey thingy that fits into the laptop because I have always wanted a lap top and wireless. It was a total surprise and I loved it. Ok.. so this one I did kinda ask for.. but I can't think of the other thing he did that I didn't ask for. But hey.. he's paying attention right?

I am also in the working on it stages of learning that someone can love you for you and that is ok. Now you'd think that would be a no brainer right? But when you have been short, not so pretty, & chubby most of your life, you see the world differently than people who are not short, who are pretty & who aren't chubby. (Don't believe me? Don just a fat suit and travel out into the world and see if you don't come back with a totally different view). It's hard to believe that a person would love you if you aren't pretty enough to be on the cover of Vogue, or a billboard for Victoria's secret.

I'm always worrying that Larry will find someone who is smarter, prettier, (especially) skinnier & has money. Stupid? Yes I know it dammit.. but I can't help it. My life's journey has been about getting screwed over and having to start fresh. So many times I could write a book about how to do it. Anyway, again, I digress... Lol

So.. I have jabbered on and on just to say that.. Although I know my family & friends mean well, and they are only looking out for my best interests because I have not made the best decisions in my life where men are concerned, I have to pose this question to you.

And really think about it...

If I had NEVER been married before... Would you be so opposed to me marrying Larry?

No? Not so much? Yeah, thought so.

My Larry is a good man. He is not perfect but neither am I. We love each other and really want to make this relationship work and have busted our asses already to get through some things that in my early life I would have simply walked away from.

(And special thanks to Shannon for telling me that she's all for me getting married again.. whenever it happens!)

Now you are asking yourself.. is there something she is trying to tell me? No. Lol. We are not getting married.. we are not even engaged. I just started thinking about how great he is, how lucky I am, and that hopefully this love will last the rest of my lifetime and I will never ever have to be with anyone else. That my friends.. would make me very happy.

So... one day we might be married.. And so you all don't think I've lost my mind (or this might set firm that I have).. here is an article I found this morning and to be quite honest.. I LOVE this idea...

Some people are just not cut out to do things in ordinary ways. Artists, iconoclasts, eccentrics, non-conformists, those who thought Ally Sheedy looked better *before* Molly Ringwald gave her that makeover in the "Breakfast Club" -- although the world expects us to do certain things in certain ways, some answer to the higher calling of their own vision, and their wedding should be no exception.
THE BRIDE Abby Ehmann
THE GROOM Eric Danville
THE DATE October 31st
THE SCENE New York City
A HALLOWED EVE

I got married on Halloween because it's my favorite holiday," explains Abby Ehmann, who, as a writer, a professional club promoter, and a New Yorker, is no stranger to doing things her own way. "I love to dress up. The aesthetic is great -- all the skulls, bats, and pumpkins. I also like the fact that it's all about having fun."
But don't think that Abby and Eric decided to get married on Halloween out of any desire to be campy or wacky or otherwise spit in the face of the sacred tradition of marriage. This loving couple decided to make their favorite holiday their wedding day (and hence forth, their anniversary) and created a ceremony that was both serious and a testament to their basic fun-loving nature.
A TRICKY TREAT
Abby and Eric's fixation with All Hallows Eve nuptials began with a seasonally appropriate proposal. "We got engaged on Halloween the year before we got married," says Abby. "We have a song that's, you know, our song, and it has this line that goes, 'You're the prize in my Cracker Jack'. So, on Halloween, Eric gave me a box of Cracker Jacks that he had somehow slit open, and in the little prize thing he put an engagement ring." Abby and Eric had designed the ring together so the proposal did not come as a complete surprise, but Eric's delivery was flawless. (I am on my way to the store to buy me some cracker jacks!!!)
BATTY INVITATIONS
With the invitations, I exercised considerable restraint," says Abby, "because I wanted to convey that we were serious about getting married -- that this wasn't a joke. We chose this fancy, pebbly, charcoal-colored paper from Kate's Paperie, and, other than a little tiny pumpkin, a little tiny ghost, and a little tiny bat on the envelopes, they were very formal." (Ok.. so I might have a hard time showing restraint.. lol)
DRESSING UP FOR HALLOWEEN
So, how does a Halloween bride settle on a wedding dress? She does just what any other bride would do: She heads out to Brooklyn to visit Kleinfeld's (or any other massive wedding-dress-ateria) with her mother, aunt, sister, and sister-in-law-to-be in tow, and tries on about a thousand dresses. "I kind of knew at that point that I wanted a black dress," Abby remembers. "But I was prepared to buy something white if I found a dress I absolutely loved." After trying on all those dresses, Abby decided she liked the princess-style of dress, with a full, flowing skirt and tight, lacy bodice."I was just walking on East Seventh Street one day," she relates, "when I saw a dressmaker's shop called Ghost Tailor and I thought -- 'this is a sign'." So she walked right in and told the dressmaker, Jean, that she wanted a custom wedding dress, with a lace top and long sleeves, and lots and lots of tulle -- all in black."Jean was way into it," says Abby, "she was very excited about doing a black wedding dress. And I ended up paying for the custom-made dress the same price as I would have at the store." (How fab is this??!!!)
BEWARE OF A BLACK HAT
Since Abby's passion for Halloween has always had a lot to do with costumes, she had a pretty clear vision of how she wanted to accessorize Jean's black masterpiece. After a not-so-successful attempt at having a hat made, once again Abby happened to be strolling through Greenwich Village when she looked into a shop window and saw the exact hat she wanted, a kind of feminine black top hat."I was aiming for a Victorian riding hat look," she says. "It was pretty expensive, but you only get married once." She gussied it up to match her dress. "It had tulle streaming down the back, with a short, kind of mini-veil of tulle that I hooked under the band and then just tore away when it was time to be kissed." (I dont know about a hat???)
MEN IN BLACK
Eric had a considerably easier time putting together his outfit. He walked into Stella Dallas, a vintage clothing store, and found exactly what he wanted -- a vintage tux jacket with tails. A visit to Antique Boutique yielded pants to match, and a black tux shirt completed the ensemble.Their maid of honor and best man were invited to wear whatever they wished, as long it was -- everybody now! --black. "We were a symphony in black," says Abby. (Black is the new white!)
A FRIGHTFULLY TRADITIONAL AFFAIR
Abby and Eric decided on St. Peter's Episcopal Church -- the oldest Gothic church in Manhattan. The actual ceremony turned out to be the most traditional aspect of the wedding, which is fitting since it is also the true heart of the event. The Trumpet Voluntary accompanied the couple down the aisle, and traditional recessional music launched them back into the world as husband and wife. They exchanged the traditional vows, though the spirit of Halloween did make at least one appearance when a friend dressed as Satan (in red body paint, pointed beard, and horns) gave a reading from Edgar Allen Poe. (Isn't that delicious?? Couldn't you see Dustin dressed as Satan reading Edgar Allen Poe???)
MORE TRICKS AND TREATS
Although the invitations read "costume optional" about half of the 300 guests came wearing at least some kind of costume, which gave the reception the air of a masquerade ball -- just what the bride and groom had hoped for. The reception was held in an S&M themed club, and looked like a big, spooky dungeon of a Halloween party.You don't have to get married on Halloween to follow in Abby and Eric's spooky footsteps (though it's hard to immediately dismiss the chance to give out wax lips as party favors -- which Abby and Eric did indeed do). But their wedding is a beautiful example of how a loving couple with an off-beat passion between them can create a wedding that is utterly original, as wells as a sincere testament to their special bond. (An S&M themed club? Masquerade ball? How divine!!!)

I love this idea because we are so ... not traditional. I mean.. a wedding should be fun & have a personality. This doesn't mean you have to forget all of the traditional stuff. Just that it's your wedding.. do what you want!!
Although.. I still haven't given up on the Las Vegas wedding officiated by Melvis.. the midget Elvis... lmao!!