I miss Home this time of year...

I miss my best friend Tracy. The way we ended up friends is very comical, but we've endured alot of problems, issues, marriages, children, break ups, get back togethers, and just life in general with never ever having a fight. We understand each other that well. I know that no matter what is going on in life I can call her and tell her and she'll have a rational explanation, or advice. Or she'll cry with me, or laugh with me.

I don't get to talk to her very often. She has a crazy life these days. Keeping up with her child as a single parent is work enough.. but she holds down a full time job as well. Then there's her boyfriend (not sure if they are on or off) who doesn't treat her well by anyone's standards.. but she loves him so we leave it at that. And her Dad and his crazy ass girlfriend. Her Dad ended up in the hospital after getting hurt in a motorcycle accident. Then there's her Mom and all of her Mom's drama. Then there's her little sister who has enough drama to have her own tv show. That girl needs to be put over someone's lap and get her ass spanked. Note to Jenny: Grow the fuck up. You are a mother now and you need to act like it. Your child needs guidance, love, respect and disipline. Those are the things YOU are suppose to be teaching your child (along with patience, etc.) not whoever happens to be babysitting at the moment.
Then there's her oldest sister who lives in FL. I'll just suffice it to say that she and I don't get along because she treats Tracy like shit and I don't like it. Note to Becky: Quit bein' J.. you have made your bed .. sleep in it. And don't forget you need diapers.

Everytime the phone rings and it's Tracy's voice on the other end I swear it feels like I could just drive down the road a piece and there she'd be. It is like time nor distance has changed a thing. Although we're 500 miles apart.

And it was very hard leaving her. But .. I was selfish, and hurting, and just needed to get away. I wish I could convince her that there is way more to this world than that hick ass, go no where town that she lives in. It's ok for retirees.. but for us... the party is over. Time to grow up and move along. But alas, it seems the only place she wants to move is FL. Hey.. at least I'd have someone to visit besides Angie right. Lol. But honestly... I don't want her to move to FL. I want her to move here. We've discussed it on many occasions and she always comes up with an excuse why she can't. So we just let it go... But it's on my wish list.

Tracy & I are as close as sisters. We have done some crazy ass shit together too. "slower, slower, slower... tear it up".. rotflmao!!!!!!!! OMG.. I'll never ever live that down. EVER, HAHAHAHA. You had to be there in the back of that Ford F150 with me, her, Jason & Tommy. Hmm.. wonder whatever happened to Tom. He was so cute.. alcoholic.. but cute. And Jason.. I think he got married?

And she is the ONLY person back home who has bothered to come see me even though I've been home on several occasions. Whew.. we had a good time when she was here. Especially at the Eagles Nest. Lol

And she's the one girl who understood, respected and agreed with my rules on men...
1. If they are or have been dating, married or otherwise attached to my friend .. they are off limits.
2. If there's any question.. see #1

Friend ... not acquaintance.. or a friend of a friend...

We met at the grocery store I worked at... she came in wearing a pony tail, sweat shirt and jeans. (As best I can recall 13 years ago). She's the sweetest person and would give you the shirt off her back and let you take her car or at least take you where you need to go. She treats everyone so good, but lets folks walk on her. She is level headed, strong, patient, loving, funny, intelligent & beautiful. She's my best friend...

And boy... the stories she could tell about me...

I sure do miss her. She was my side kick, my best friend, my co-hort, my shoulder, my eyes, my helper, my sister. No matter how much time and space is between us I will always love her like she's my blood relative.

I feel guilty if I go to long without calling her or at least texting her.. but I think about her all the time. You know how that goes. You start thinking about somebody and have about a minute and a half to yourself to think and then reality steps back in and it's forgotten and you move on. Then you finally get 5 mins to yourself and you're able to call or write.

Tracy.. I dont know if you'll ever read my blog.. but if you do.. Thank you for so many things. I could never have asked for a better friend than you. You were my lifeline so many times and my level head when I wasn't. I miss you terribly and it is very hard not having my best friend here with me as I go through my daily life. You are like my little sister and I wish we were closer. I wish I had been able to grow up around Remington and help you out with him when you needed it.. but I was to far away. I have a lot of guilt over that. Does it count that I was there right after you gave birth and came bearing a big, blue, adorable cow? He doesn't really know me and I hate that. Thanks for making sure he knew who I was all those times I came home.. that meant a lot to me... more than you'll ever know.

I really miss you...